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Wednesday, November 20, 2013

- A Mothers Cry -



            One of the things that we decided to do with Project 21 recently is to fed malnourished kids at the hospital. Tuesday morning we have a cooking demonstration on how to make nutritious bouille (rice porridge). Other times we just make it and give it to them. We are trying to start feeding the kids three days a week twice a day. Today I helped to make the bouille and distribute it at the hospital. Today there were 11 children that were considered malnourished, which was about half of the kids there. In the evening I helped distribute it once again. When we were about to feed some more we heard some crying. I didn't pay much attention to it at first, because I thought that it was a kid. Then Naomi (our translator) informed us that a baby just died. I have never been in the same room when someone just died. I have been to quite a few funerals, but that's much different. It’s harder to look at a limp body that was alive a few minutes before. How can the baby be dead? Maybe he is just unconscious. I wanted to deny the death, since it happened so recently. Living in the U.S. I have been so sheltered from death unlike how it is in places like here.
            Shannice and I stood on the side observing what was happening. People in pediatric ward started to gather around the lady with the baby. Some people said things to her while others just stared. I looked over and saw a guy bending over the bed crying, who we assume was the father. The hardest thing for me to see is a man crying. Tears started to develop in my eyes, but I just held them back as much as possible. The woman who we assume was the mother started to whale out things. She had tears running down her face and was exclaiming her pain. A nurse came by and took the IV for blood transfusion and Quinine out of the babies arm. It seemed so final. Do you sit there after your child has died? What is there left to do? They started to pack up the little that they brought to the hospital. The baby that died is one of the babies that we feed earlier. Did the bouille that we made for him not make a difference? Would it have helped if we feed him more? So many questions flooded my mind as I watched. I watched the pain that was in their faces. I watched as other mothers began to cry. I watched as someone tried to close the eyes of the lifeless baby. Then they took a small cloth and tied it around the babies face, so that you couldn't see his eyes. Then they got up and left the hospital grounds.
            As I stood there I thought of the other people that were in the hospital. As they looked at this family did they fear what would happen to their own? They were only a bed or two over, so death could easily come knocking at their door. Which child’s life would be next? Whose family would have to leave in agony as the fight against the disease ended in defeat? It’s sad to think that way, but it’s reality here.
           As we continued to feed there was a silence that was in the air. There was also a deep silence within myself. There was nothing that I could do. Saying sorry to them would amount to nothing. I do not have any children, so I don't understand that type of loss. Death is part of life, but it hurts me most when it is a child that dies. As I write this post I am still saddened within me. I don't know the baby, but I feel some of the pain that the family feels. My heart goes out to the family that just lost their baby. May they be comforted in this time of despair and find hope. 
            The bouille that we made may not have saved the boys life, but we hope that it makes a difference in others. The bouille is full of nutritious things that can help the children to grow fatter, while at their stay at the hospital. We also hope that by demonstrating how to make it with a few extra ingredients, more families will do it that way and save their children. We are hoping that every scoop of bouille could make a difference in their life.
~ Comfort those that need comforting ~

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